Characters: Opportunities

Even routine days are packed with more opportunities than we realize. Simply changing a morning walk time or route could put you in on the path of someone who needs a smile. Turning down a different grocery aisle could land you in front of someone who can't quite reach what's on the top shelf—but you can. It's our choice to walk on by and mind our own business.

Or, we can get involved and possibly get messy.

For my birthday this year, I wanted to do something totally different. A new, frightening experience. I only say "frightening" because I'm a bit of a control freak. I enjoy planning my days out with efficiency to get the best mileage out of the gas in my car, make the most of time, and find the best deals on groceries. As much as I loved the thought of going on a mission trip to help those in need, giving up control scared me.

But I gave up my birthday to go on a mission trip to Nashville anyway.

Goodbye healthy diet, exercise schedule, bedtime schedule, comfy sleeping arrangements, and the ability to take a much-needed social off day. I knew going in that I would probably be sleeping on the floor, eating gluten (which often messes with my stomach), and may have to serve with small children. All of the above happened, but I served anyway.

And I loved what I got out of it.

Thank God, my husband went with me. He was immense support in keeping me sane, and we grew closer together as we served the nearby communities. We paired up with a youth group from another state, and we all got our hands dirty. The agenda held everything from serving at a low-income ministry daycare to doing yardwork for an elderly lady with MS. We also built a wheelchair ramp (pictured) for an elderly man. Seeing their tearful smiles of gratitude when we closed out with blessing prayers was the highlight of the trip.

Hubs and I were both exhausted when we returned home, but the experiences we had were worth venturing out of our comfort zones. Through prayer and relying on God, I didn't break down—even when the kids around me started bickering and pelting me with toys instead of their intended targets. I would honestly rather mow 5 yards than babysit a single-digit-aged kid for an hour. Still, I made it through.

And I used my birthday to bless others.

Several years ago, I asked my friends and family to stop giving me presents. I asked instead that they either take me out to eat with them to have quality time or donate what they would have spent on a gift to a charity of their choice. The responses varied, but I held firm.

I need nothing. For that, I owe God everything. I want to share the blessings I have and hope that example will inspire others to do the same.

The actions of the people around us are a window to reveal their characters. How do they use (or abuse) opportunities? When their birthday rolls around, do they ask for mountains of presents or use the day to bless others? Maybe both? Answering these questions provides excellent building blocks when it comes to character development.

I decided to put together a quick list of situations (as always, age/race/gender do not matter here) for the sake of brainstorming characters. Since the birthday example is fresh, I'll use that. Just from a short description, a character can take shape.

How a character treats their birthday:

- This person sends a list of fifty pricey items to all their friends and relatives

- This person asks to be left alone and doesn't even want phone calls

- This person expects no gifts and only asks their mom to cook their favorite meal

- This person delays breaking up with their significant other in order to use their beach house once more

- This person gets upset if anyone acknowledges their birthday

- This person shares a birthday with a classmate and asks for all their gifts to be sent to their classmate instead

- This person spends half their savings to rent out a fancy venue and only invites wealthy friends

- This person hides away from their family

A special day to one person could be the most dreaded moment for another. I could take that last example and dig deeper...

This person hides away from their family because:

- Their parents plan to kick them out

- One grandparent always guilts them about not being married/having kids/being a boss yet

- They are very wealthy, and family gatherings mean relatives ask them for money

- Their family invites people they don't like to the party

- They hate pretending to like the gifts, which are mostly freebies and thoughtless regifts that prove their family knows little about them

I could go on and on, but these examples already tell us so much about what a character might be feeling when their birthday nears.

Observing people is one of my joys. I like to find out who they are through their actions/reactions/responses. Anyone can tell me they're a generous person, but I won't believe it until I see an example. We all like to think more highly of ourselves than we ought, myself included. In my case, I do better when I humble myself and lift others up above me. This keeps me from getting an ego and becoming closedminded or stingy.

If a life's value depends on how much time and effort are given to others, I want to die knowing I gave more than I took.

It's not easy to take the role of a servant, but it is fulfilling. If I can inspire others to take a first step out of their comfort zone and into a position of serving, that would be an amazing birthday gift.

Keep on smilin'!