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Writer's pictureLahna Greene

Author calling card, "corpulent"


When I first saw this newly hatched snapping turtle trying to pick a precarious path across the park trail, the word I thought was anything but "corpulent." Yes, it was round to the point that I almost mistook it for a rock, but baby animals are more likely to carry the labels "cute" or "tiny."


In this case, it was "vulnerable." I moved the poor hatchling closer to the pond so it didn't get kicked or crunched.


But isn't it funny how certain words, phrases, or concepts can be recycled through media? For me, the word "corpulent" is a throwback to one of the worst movie failures ever, but still one of my guilty pleasures: Super Mario Bros.


Since I grew up a Nintendo girl, Mario was my first digital obsession. Platforming games quickly became my favorites. Funny how the concept of crushing digital turtles with wings is totally normal in the game realm, but I scrambled to pull a snapper hatchling off the park trail. No creatures—not even beetles—will be squished on my watch. Digital creatures? I can slay them to no end.


When I heard of a live action Super Mario movie, I was an ecstatic kid. Actually, I can't remember when I first saw it, but I still have the beat-up VHS tape. Poor Bob Hoskins...he regretted playing Mario in that movie the rest of his life. I'm not sure about John Leguizamo's feelings. The entire film was full of plot holes, multiple sexual undertones, and graphics befitting a film from ten years previous. Even with the lengthy list of flaws, I adored it. The inclusion of an intricate and still impressive animatronic Yoshi meant I couldn't truly hate it. Yoshi is still one of my favorite characters.



But there, in the middle of a ridiculous plotline that took Mario and Luigi to a desert, a brilliant pin light of writing gleamed in the hour and forty-four minute black hole. One of the bad guys asks Luigi a question about another character. The response was perfection.


Bad guy: Was she corpulent? Very corpulent?

Luigi: Naaa, she was just really round.


I died. Even though I had never used the word before, I knew at that moment what it meant. A friend pointed out that I always try to sneak it into my novels. It's true! The word "corpulent" often sneaks in to my novels, an eternal throwback to this colossal film flop. I'm fully invested in this. And now, only a select few will know why. *Wink*


I believe this is true of all creatives. Among those patterns of prominent themes, we all hide a glint of pure personality, missed by 99% of consumers. If asked about it, we just smile, holding the secret close.


Keep on smilin'!


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